PREPARING FOR THE RE-LAUNCH

As I embark on re-launching HER podcast, I needed to go back to the beginning.  It's been 15 years since I began this journey of Healing, Empowerment and Restoration but somehow I feel that the journey has just begun.

Grief.  My journey started with grief.  Most often when we think of grief, we associated it with death of a loved one and that is right where my grief began...with the death of my mom in 2005.   Since then I've learned a lot about grief including that any type of loss brings grief.  That year I experienced 3 losses - loss of a loved one, loss of a marriage and loss of a job. So I was REALLY grieving and boy o by was I a basket case. Maybe I should have said 4 losses because in the midst of everything I lost myself.

For 16 years I had played the role of wife and mother.  I was very young when I married - 23 with an 18 month old daughter whom I loved more than life itself.  I was determined to be the mom that I always wanted and to give my children the family life that I always craved.  I immersed myself into being the best wift and mommy ever

 I thought I did everything right.  I was a member is good standing at church, kept a clean house, cooked healthy meals, 3 daughters always clean, well-dressed, hair done. Husband a well-respected deacon. I was a sabbath school teacher, choir member, bible study leader etc.  Living across the street from the church, our house was like Graham Central Station on Sabbath with church "family" gathering for potluck dinners

I was a supportive and encouraging wife  wife who helped him stare and run a business, To the outside world we were the picture perfect church going family running a successful business.  My reality was something different.

Looking back, I realize that those were all HIS people.  When I married him I not only took his name, but I accepted his religion, family and friends. I forsook people who I'd grown up with, my childhood friends and even some relatives because I thought I was in love and focused solely on my family life.

Don't get me wrong, my mom, g-mom, aunts, great-aunts and god-mother were always around; looking over me.  They'd seen and or experienced it all before.  They knew the intricate details that I tried to hide from the world.   They knew what I didn't know yet

 - that I had created a bubble for myself and my children and that one day that bubble would surely burst.  I turned 40 in February of 2005 and that is the year my bubble finally burst. Grandmom, great-aunts were gone by then and my mom would be gone later that year.  In March I finally got the courage to leave a loveless marriage that had turned out to be a total lie. That lead to me leaving my place of employment because that was tied to him and them mom died.  I was left to deal with the aftermath all alone. 

Being a product of a matriarchal family of strong black women, I had it in my blood to stand strong in what would be the journey of a lifetime.  This was the toughest period of my life and I was all alone. I tried to remain faithful and encouraged.  I thought " seven. Seven years and it will be done.  Seven is the number for completion according to the bible. Well 7 years came and went and my life was still in turmoil.  Now, to be honest, I bought a lot of it on myself.  All the anger, bitterness, sadness, betrayal made me onery and I became my own worst enemy. So 7 years came and went so I thought EIGHT! Eight is the number for new beginnings!  After 8 years things will get better. But I was still in a state of utter confusion, still very angry and hurt. I tried praying, writing - I did all kinds of things to keep myself busy and took it day by day.  I wrote a book which was therapeutic but I realized that I was blaming EVERYBODY for what I was going through and that no one was really to blame.  Not even me.  This was just life.  My life.  My journey. and I had to find my way to my destination. The destination was to be HEALED EMPOWERED AND RESTORED.

I now understand that it is not about the DESTINATION; it is about the JOURNEY for the journey is where you grow.  It is where the lessons are learned, wisdom is acquired and your character is developed.

PLEASE VISIT OUR NEW WEBSITE AND SUBSCRIBE SO THAT WE MAY CONTINUE THE JOURNEY TOGETHER, ENCOURAGING AND UPLIFTING ONE ANOTHER.

HERHEALEMPOWERRESTORE.COM

" TIME ISN'T THE MAIN THING, IT'S THE ONLY THING" Miles Davis

 Four years.

It has been 4 years since my last post on my blog. There has just been so much going on.  I feel like Dorothy caught up in a tornado.  But the good news is that I RECEIVED A KIDNEY OF MARCH 16TH!

But I am working on it and believe me, it will be worth the wait.

Thanks for your continued prayers and support throughout the years.  

Please keep my Donor's family in your prayers.

I am sincerely and eternally grateful.

SPECIAL SHOUT OUT TO DELAWARE VALLEY NEPHROLOGY!  IF YOU EVER HAVE A KIDNEY PROBLEM GO SEE THEM.  THEY ARE THE BEST!

Travel Tips. From Check In to Carry On.

It’s finally here! Vacation is only 7 days away and the excitement has you overly pumped before the nagging thought of packing comes to mind. From what to pack to which size luggage to pack your items in, all races through your head like NASCAR. And no matter what your goal is to avoid check baggage fees and carry on your luggage but it seems impossible since you’ve now packed your entire Spring, Summer and Winter wardrobes. 

Many times we’re so excited about traveling and landing some place we’ve never been that we actually pack as if we’re not coming back home! I know I’ve been guilty of this in the past. Below I’ve shared some tips and suggestions on how to pack light by only bringing items and clothing you will actually need while traveling. If you lighten your bag by packing only the essentials, you can save $50 or more per round trip flight!

Where Are You Going and for How LONG?

Ding! Ding! Ding! The magic question! Pack your bags according to your length of stay. For instance, a 4 day/3 night getaway should not warrant for 15 rounds of changing clothes. My gosh not even at the Grammies do they change that much! Chances are you’ll only need about 2 pairs of slacks/pants, 4 shirts, 2 pairs of jeans, 1 dress that you can dress up or down and 2 pairs of footwear; 1 pair for day and the other at night. And don’t be afraid to bring along laundry detergent.

Apply The Shirt to Pants Rule

Reminder the Shirt to Pants Rule? The rule says this: for every 1 pair of slacks or pants you should have 2 dress shirts or 2 blouses to make it appear as if you have 2 different outfits. Well that same rule applies for traveling! This rule can also be applied when packing footwear. And don’t be ashamed to bring your favorite pair of sneakers or shoes. If they fall apart while traveling, at least that’s one less item to bring back. Or, you can always use that as the perfect excuse to buy another pair while on your journey! Remember your goal is to avoid checked baggage fees by packing smarter.

Footwear in Bag First

There was a time where I would throw my footwear on top of the clothes I put in my luggage and wondered why it would never close or would appear bulky. Later, I discovered that if I placed my footwear in a draw string bag and then place them in my luggage it would afford more space and wouldn’t appear bulky. Place your footwear in a plastic bag first then into your luggage. This alone illuminates that bulky look and gives more packing room.

Packing Cubes

By far the Packing Cube is a traveler’s best friend next to visiting the island of Jamaica! Packing Cubes come in packages that offer various sizes for your travel needs. You can pack all clothing items in one bag and footwear in another. It saves time, money and space. 

"Seasons of Hope" Part 1 NOW Available on Kindle

"There is nothing new under the sun."

For many centuries, sexuality has been a taboo subject.  People of the same sex have been attracted to each other since ancient times.  Homosexuality and Lesbianism has been the root of self-hatred, suicides and mental illness in individuals.  In an effort to not disappoint parents, family and society, some try to live a “normal” life. This decision often has adverse effects on the individual and the people in their lives.

CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE!

"Seasons of Hope" is a fictional account of one woman's journey through a series of unfortunate, life altering events.  At the root is her coming to the realization that her husband is gay. The story follows one man’s struggle with his sexuality and the lengths he will go through to keep it a secret.  .  It takes the reader on a spiritual  journey through  seasons of betrayal, brokenness, healing, empowerment and restoration.

"An ugly truth is better than a beautiful lie."