Not that I even have any prospects but people often ask me if I would ever get married again. So I thought about it.
Here are some of my recent thoughts on the matter.
❤️ Marriage Should Be Partnership, Not Completion
A healthy marriage doesn’t complete you—it complements you.
Your spouse can bring companionship, intimacy, partnership, support, laughter, shared purpose, and experiences you couldn’t have alone. But they shouldn’t be responsible for your identity, self-worth, emotional stability, or purpose.
Two people who believe they must complete each other can place enormous pressure on a relationship.
But two people who say, “I am already whole, and I choose you,” enter marriage from a much healthier place.
You don’t marry because you found someone who makes you whole.
You marry because you found someone with whom you can share the wholeness you’ve cultivated.
And perhaps most importantly:
Being single isn’t a waiting room for marriage.
It’s a season to become deeply acquainted with yourself—your values, purpose, boundaries, desires, wounds, strengths, and relationship with God—so that when love comes, you don’t abandon yourself to keep it.
Whole vs. Complete Before Marriage
There’s a subtle but powerful difference between being whole and being complete before marriage.
🌱 Being Whole
Being whole means having a healthy relationship with yourself. You don’t need another person to fill your wounds, validate your worth, or make you feel enough.
A whole person can say:
I know who I am.
I know my values and boundaries.
I can be alone without feeling incomplete.
I take responsibility for my healing.
I don’t need a partner to rescue me.
I can love without losing myself.
Wholeness is internal health, self-awareness, and integration.
✨ Being Complete
Being complete means understanding that marriage is not the missing piece of your identity or existence.
You are already a whole, complete individual before becoming someone’s spouse.
Marriage shouldn’t take you from:
“I’m incomplete” → “Now I’m complete.”
It should move you from:
“I am whole by myself” → “I choose to build a life with another whole person.”
As we grow older our perspectives sometimes change. Sometimes we “Re-Self” ourselves as we get to know ourselves.
I guess the bottom line is that we bit need to be whole and complete before contemplating marriage.
Just some thoughts. #HEALINGJOURNEY #RESTORATIONINPROCESS
